Everything I Never Told You

Synopsis: Lydia Lee is the middle child of Marilyn and James Lee. She is found dead, drowned in a nearby lake. Her family is left reeling with unanswered questions and the realization that they didn’t know as much about her as they had thought. Her death prompts the entire family to reflect on their lives and how to move forward. The Lees are an interracial family. James is of Chinese descent, an American history professor at a midwestern college. Marilyn had hoped to be a doctor, but gave up her ambitions to raise her family. This is a sensitively written story about an imperfect but well-meaning family coping with setbacks and grief, with a few mysteries thrown in for good measure.

Review: I decided to read this book after recently finishing Our Missing Hearts by Celeste Ng. Everything I Never Told You is Ng’s 2014 debut novel, and while relatively short, I thought packed a pretty powerful punch. Ng is very skillful at creating multi-faceted characters that are relatable and very human. James, born of Chinese immigrant parents, marries a white woman, in some measure as part of his effort to assimilate and fit in. His area of expertise, as a professor of American history, is the American West, basically a cowboy expert! It truly doesn’t get much more American than that. In contrast, Marilyn wanted to stand out. Her professional aspirations of becoming a doctor were thwarted by family expectations (this is the 1970’s), and now she is hyper focused on forcing her own lost dreams on their favored child Lydia. This is not a feel good kind of book. It made me sad, and a bit mad, yet it’s full of small details that I don’t think I’ll ever forget. The scene where Marilyn decides to read Lydia’s diaries in an effort to understand her death is chilling to the core. It really makes you think about how hard it is to truly know another person.

Rating: 4/5

Recipe: The Betty Crocker cookbook features in this novel as a symbol of Marilyn’s frustration and failures. Her tense relationship with her mother was in part due to Marilyn’s desire to escape the restrictive role of a housewife, while her mother Doris (a Home Ec teacher!) valued the domestic arts. The only thing that reminds Marilyn of her mother is the cookbook, which she saves and later reads, shedding a few tears along the way. A full cookie jar might not lead to domestic bliss, but it doesn’t hurt. This recipe for rosemary-lemon shortbread cookies is one of my favorites.

Ingredients:

3 sticks of unsalted butter, softened

1 cup sugar

1 tablespoon finely grated lemon zest

2 teaspoons finely chopped fresh rosemary

1/2 teaspoon kosher salt

1 teaspoon vanilla

3 1/2 cups all-purpose flour

Icing: 1 1/2 cups confectioner’s sugar, 1 lemon zested and juiced

1) Heat oven to 350 degrees. Line a 9 x 13 inch pan with foil and lightly butter

2) Pulse the sugar with the lemon zest and rosemary in a food processor until well combined. Remove 2 tablespoons of the sugar mixture and reserve.

3) Add the butter, salt, and vanilla to the food processor and pulse until combined. Add the flour, about a cup at a time, pulsing to combine after each addition. continue to pulse until a dough comes together.

4) Turn the dough out into the prepared pan and press it evenly into the pan. Poke the dough all over with a fork and sprinkle with the reserved sugar.

5) Bake until the edges are golden brown and the center is golden, about 25 minutes. As soon as it is out of the oven, cut into 1 x 3 “ pieces. cool in the pan for 15 minutes, then remove using the foil as handles. cool completely on a rack.

6) Combine confectioner’s sugar and lemon zest and juice in a medium bowl, whisk to combine. Whisk in 1 tablespoon of water or more if needed for the desired thickness.

7) Drizzle the icing over the cookies and allow to set.